I admit it. I come fists flailing, nails scratching, tongue searing when someone tells me I’m not good enough or I’m not doing it the “right” way. I have a pretty strong history growing up hearing that way too much. About 10 years ago I decided I really was my own person and for the most part I didn’t really care what anybody thought of me except God, my husband and my kids.
As you can imagine I’m getting really prickly towards social media lords Chris Brogan and Michael Hyatt who continually post “productive” blogs about why people stop subscribing to your blog or why I should care about that. They’re trying to be helpful but they are essentially saying you aren’t good enough, you aren’t doing it right.
I got all my feathers out of whack when I saw the title of Michael Perkins blog this week. His blog entitled “Untitled” posted “Why I don’t care about your blog.” http://theperkinsblog.net/2011/07/12/why-i-dont-care-about-your-blog/
My first thought “was here is another yahoo, telling me I’m not good enough, I’m not doing it right, and he has all the answers!” And boy did I have it in for him. And then I calmed my tempest soul and you know, actually read his blog. Ahem… and I got it.
I don’t care how many comments you get.
I don’t care how much traffic you get.
I don’t care about how many “likes” and “RT’s” you get.
My frustration is that no matter where I go each of my identities and roles are usually bound and gagged. As a stay at home mom, most business people don’t want to hear about my worries and stress. Theirs is greater. As an entrepreneur of a Christ based non profit, most ministries don’t feel we have the same magnitude of impact. When viewed as a ministry leader in the secular community, I’m viewed as emotionally driven and not realistic. As a woman in the tradition of church I attend, my thoughts and beliefs are are not necessary or important.
I had even stopped blogging about 2 years ago and deleted my blog from Blogger because of the backlash I received from other woman about my opinions on my own blog. Thus the reasoning behind the title “The Rabid Mime.” Most of the time I feel like I’m jumping up and down with so much to say, but nobody is listening. I feel like I’m being gagged, restricted, and censored.
But you know what I remembered? I’m not forcing anyone to read anything I write or listen to anything I have to say. It’s a free country for me to write about anything I want as frequently or infrequently as I feel. It’s a free country for them not to listen.
So Michael Perkins, forgive me. Really. Sometimes I speak before I think. But at least writing what I think makes me slow down and think things through. But then again, I don’t really care who reads this anyway.
This is a place where I can have a voice.