Running is cathartic for me.
I’m not fast. At all. But give me time and I can cover some serious terrain.
I started running at age 11 to condition for serious basketball camps. I continued running after age 11 because that’s about the point my family life really started to deteriorate. My family didn’t understand why I was running since I wasn’t a noteworthy runner nor did they want to participate so it was perfect for me. I could run away from home for awhile and nobody would be the wiser. My introverted side was protected.
At that point in time I mostly ran around the cemetary close to my house. Again, a spot most people who knew my extroverted side wouldn’t think to look for me. Because I had run it during the day, I could run in the dark without running into anything.
DH and I ran last night near our vacation condo. We knew we had seen a sidewalk close by and thought it would be safe enough to run. It turned out to be a lot farther away. Despite the full moon It was pretty much pitch dark. I was wondering if the Army surplus we had passed on the way in carried night goggles. I’m certain the cars coming and going never saw us. Several times we heard animal rustlings in the brush next to us. We couldn’t seem to get in a pace since we didn’t know what was coming next. We would pound the pavement up seemingly never ending hills. I’m not sure if my heart was pounding from the exertion or the fear.
DH seemed more confident that I felt. He seem to have his inner night goggles on for the two of us. He kept moving me away from road and calling when cars were coming to make sure I moved even further into the shoulder. He’s got a much faster pace than I do so I told him to run ahead if he wanted to and I would eventually follow. He told me this.
We’re in this together, forever and ever.
I realized that running is still cathartic for me. My preference is still to run by myself and my own pace. But when the course is unsure and scary and freaky dark I’m so grateful for DH to run it with me. He knows when I need to run by myself, when to tell me I need to run by myself, and then to make sure I cross the line.